Dark Moon Musings: Grief, Death, and Mourning
It is now the new moon. A few days ago on the last day of the Dark Moon, I woke up from dreaming about those who had passed away into the next adventure. They’ve gone, and I (and we) are left in this incarnation, to carry on without them . Their wholeness; in their loving, frustrating, irritating, happy. joyful. ways are no longer in this time and space. I dreamt of my mother. a dog, a niece, and a cat, awakening to a feeling of sadness (not depression, sadness!). It doesn’t matter, really, what species, grief often comes upon us while we are, as John Lennon sang, making other plans.
I realized that day, too, was the birthday of a dear friend who has died from cancer in 2019. She was beloved by so many people and our friendship was long, so my social media was full of her memories and tributes. It was both tearful and joyful.
And I learned, that a former co-worker had entered Hospice While not surprising, it is very sad. I have wanted to drop him a note and one to his spouse, whom I’ve never met. I have been searching for words and I finally found inspiration in the old mournful folk song by Canadian singers, Ian & Sylvia. “Four Strong Winds” is a song about a break-up, but a portion of the lyrics are about any kind of departure: “But our good times are all gone/and I’m bound for moving on/I’ll look for you if I’m ever back this way.”
My mind has already changed the lyrics to “I’ll look for you if you’re ever back this way.” I am someone who believes that the dead speak to us after they leave. All we have to do is pay attention and accept that these are messages of love and memory. My niece is in every sunset I watch and all the sunflowers I see; my mother is flying with the hummingbirds and in so many other places. Departed pets come in dreams and in behaviors of living animals.
And finally, when we die, we become Ancestors to those who remain after we are gone. We are, at this moment, in training. Sweet Honey in the Rock reminds that we are receiving wisdom always in their song Breaths.